There are all kinds of relationships…but here are six that I find a little, and one that I find really “scary.”
We don’t really know anything about each other.
Consider the fact that most people send their representative out on at least the first 5 dates, and add to that the reality that the majority of people who date don’t want to ask hard questions about the other person, and the possibility of not really knowing anything about each other becomes very real.
But it doesn’t have to stay this way. Both parties can ask meaningful questions so that they do get to know each other. Questions such as:
- What are your expectations for someone you’re in a relationship with?
- Have you ever cheated? Why did you (if you did)?
- What are your life and career goals?
help you come to an understand about who the person you call your “signif” (significant other).
I don’t like you, despite saying I love you.
Admittedly, I spent a decade in a relationship with someone I loved, but didn’t like. But, liking the person you’re in a relationship with supersedes loving them–believe it or not. The friendship element of your relationship helps sustain the rest of your relationship. Out of friendship is born respect, trust, honesty, communication, common ground. Friendship is the foundation of an amazing love story.
We don’t share anything/our communication sucks.
Sometimes we find ourselves in relationships with people who don’t let us into their lives. If this is you, consider sharing some thing that is special, but doesn’t make you uncomfortable. If you’re person who feels a bit jilted about what you’re not being told, then perhaps its time to look at the root of this situation.
Of course, you could always schedule an intervention or mediation, and we can talk through the things that are not being talked about.
I can’t trust you.
While this is a warning for both guys and gals, guys need to be aware that the gals in their lives need stability. Stability doesn’t stop with trusting you to take care of things and being financially secure. Trust and stability starts with keeping your word, calling/coming/doing when you say you will. Every promise needs to be kept, or admitted that it can’t be kept. It’s scares people (no pun) to be connected to someone that doesn’t keep their word, or fails to admit when they can’t.
In the end, everyone needs to be able to believe in the person they are with. Your word is your bond.
It’s just sex…REALLY!
You cannot build a relationship that lasts on sex. You can build a sexual relationship, but to attempt to turn that into something meaningful is usually futile. If it’s just sex, then that’s a decision that you BOTH should make, along with setting boundaries, getting tested, and agreeing that being physically intimate does not imply or guarantee an exclusive, long-term, or loving relationship.
If you want an exclusive, long-term relationship, you may want to consider exploring sex-free relationships so you can get to know each other and spend quality time without the burden of STDs, pregnancy scares, or late night texts asking, “what are
you doing?”
Lastly, you hurt me.
This is not just about emotional pain, but physical pain as well. Without going through all the signs of an abusive relationship, the one thing that you have to know is that if you don’t feel safe…you probably aren’t safe. Not only is today Halloween, but it’s the last day of Domestic Violence Awareness month. If you’re in an abusive relationship–emotional, physical, financial, etc, perhaps it’s time to make this “last time,” be the LAST TIME. Get CONFIDENTIAL help now…
In conclusion, there are definitely some other scary relationships, and if you see your relationship in one of the seven above…there is something you can do about it. There is no reason to settle for an average relationship when you can have an amazing relationship using the same time, energy and emotions. Learn more…